hold me by the hair and drown me underwater

beat my insides until they beg for leave

let my nerves hold no ties between body &heart

scalpel, be free and move to the music 

assist me in my freedom and cut me loose 

the knot explands drastically in the throat

heat circulates through veins 

eyes swell into hand loads and muscles tighten 

hatred accumulates into explosion 

&devilish thoughts are wished upon

in a dark room, walls are covered with mirrors  

a man whose face is hidden behind cloth sits in the corner

a familiar love earnestly pleads for intimacy

“not here”, i refused suspiciously

pleading did not cease and his hands become nimble 

nerves tremble and my mind becomes absent

my eyes become another spectator in the room

stripped bare to the only thin cloth that prevents penatration

without a moments hesitation, he slips himself in

he mutters nonsense to himself and i am frightened

I push away but he continues to invite himself in. 

managing free, belongings are kept secret in the room next 

he betrays me for ordering words behind thin mirrors

trailing behind, he pressures substance in me. 

hands my only barrier, tears falling profusely, and i am held captive, again.